ONLY ME

On the way home tonight B dropped me off at my favorite Mexican restaurant so I could meet Adam there for dinner. Roach and Jen are in Vegas (Roach won a trip playing pool) and Roach gave us his Cavalier so Adam could take it to the shop to get it worked on. He has to go take it to get a new windshield tomorrow, too; it's had a crack in it. Adam was in that, so B just took the G6 home (her first solo car trip since getting her license!) and I stayed with Adam to eat.

The service was TERRIBLE--it has been lately, but since it's our favorite, we tend to overlook it. Then afterward we went to the bank to get $2500 out to pay Adam's dad off for the taxes and the Monte (we want to hang onto it for awhile). We took out an extra $100 and went to scope out our next purchase, a twinkie Camaro. Some guy Adam knows is selling his 1981 hardtop Z28 Camaro for $100. We wanted it for parts. I thought it was going to be a hunk of SHIT the way Adam was talking about it, but it ended up being really nice!!! That is, considering it's $100. So now I have grand dreams of having my very own 1981 Camaro. Wouldn't we be so cute--in matching Camaros?? Well, mine would be a hardtop, but still. It'd be freaking SWEET.

Then we were on our way home. As you might know, we've had "sniper" shootings in the area on Cline Ave. It's actually a highway and I travel it every day--to and from work. Statistically the odds of me getting hit by the sniper are pretty freaking good. Since it's never happened Scott and Robert at work joke that I'M the Cline Ave sniper... I always seem to be there right before/after a hit but I never get hit!

WELL, that all changed.

Adam and I are on Cline in ROACH'S CAR merging onto the 80/94 entrance ramp when Adam makes this noise--kind of a mumbling stutter surprise sound--and next thing I know I hear this huge CRACKSMASH and I'm COVERED in GLASS SHARDS.

You know how they always say that you never know you've been shot right away? I was in such SHOCK from being splattered with glass... I could hardly bring myself to look down, I was seriously scared I was going to have a bullet hole in my chest and not even realize it. When I finally got the balls to look down I saw that I was just glittery with glass shards all over my body. There was no blood.

Adam said "It was a rock! It was a rock!" I said "IT WAS THE FUCKING SNIPER! IT WAS THE SNIPER!" We pulled over and I was like "WHAT THE FUCK!!!" Adam was pissed and on the phone to the cops. Someone had THROWN a rock at our car--Adam saw it coming at us and that's why he made that sound right before we got hit. It was a huge rock, he said about 6" in diameter. HUGE. Not something a truck could kick up... especially since it came OVER THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY from a grassy area!!

It took FOREVER for a cop to show up. In the meantime I got out of the car and shook off all the glass and tried to get it off of my arms. I had little pin pricks of blood all over my arms from where the shards were in it. Adam called Roach to tell him part of his windshield was smashed. He just asked if we were okay. Since he was getting it replaced tomorrow anyway I don't think he much cared. I told Adam "We're going to be on TV!" I asked him how it felt to look over and see me covered in glass. He said he was really scared.

When a cop finally showed up he was SKINNY like a beanpole and dressed in a brown uniform. We told him what happened and he said that his buddy (aka another officer) had caught a guy RUNNING ACROSS CLINE from where the rock was thrown. He hadn't known about the windshield so the other officer just stopped him, got his info, and let him run along. They're pretty positive it was him. I'm pretty positive too. The guy who showed up first was a K9 unit, so he went off to search the grassy area with the dog and told us to hang tight when his cop buddy showed up. Supposedly Lake County was going to come out and take crime scene pictures.

The first beanpole dude (when we joked about the sniper) said "Sniper? Psh. Fucking BB-gun bandit is what that is." No shit. I thought so. Media, media. The next guy rolled his eyes about his boss (the sheriff) and how he has a special task force, etc. They agree it's out of control and that they're sick of all the bullshit happening on Cline. The second cop had to wait with us forever and so we were chatting it up. He kind of gave Adam a look and then started telling me to go home and take a cool shower (this after he heard I was covered in glass). He said if you have shards you shouldn't shower with hot water. Then (with another glance to Adam) told me if I thought it was a good idea, to shower WITH my underwear on first, and then without my underwear on. I don't know why this is, but he knows more about glass than I do. So I might be getting in a cool shower with my undies on. Or he might be laughing at the visual of me getting into a cool shower with my underwear on.

And it's funny, because both cops who saw it agreed it's the WORST incident they've seen since the "sniper shootings"!! Funny how that happens. I'm pretty pissed because I had leftover Mexican food, I was so looking forward to eating it, but it was in the front seat of the car and I'm sure there's glass in it and I had to toss it.

I had B go to my house to let the dogs out. Eventually we had three squads by us and they told us to go on home. I rode home in the back seat, the front seat was covered in glass. I had B take some pictures. I look like an idiot but at least I can laugh about it.



Adam... looking like a dork...


Had it hit a little lower, I think it wouldh ave gone THROUGH the windshield. I was sitting RIGHT THERE... I would be needing plastic surgery if that were the case...


Me.